Life as a Remora

This morning I was journaling about the Hot Ones YouTube show, which interviews celebrities while having them eat progressively spicier chicken (or vegan) wings. It occurred to me that celebrity interviewers are akin to the remoras that attach themselves to sharks and other large marine animals. They’re tolerated by the larger fish because they often perform a useful “cleaning” service, cleaning up parasites and other bits of junk that collect on the larger animal. 

In the celebrity world of Hollywood, interviews and interviewers are tolerated because they help the movie star sell seats in movies. It then occurred to me that I perform a similar function in the aerospace business. Here’s how I put it on Twitter, with a little added flourish from Scott Adams:

This isn’t necessarily a bad thing…each to his/her own ecological, professional, or social niche, I guess. It’s just that I used to have bigger dreams for myself. I was going to be a creator, an author, a dreamer of big dreams. For the past 20 years I’ve shifted to writing and editing the dreams of others–people with more creativity, more education in the sciences or engineering–to the point where I’ve doubted or just given up on my idea of being a “big fish” on my own one day.

Welcome to middle age.

Who Do You Become When You’re Left Alone With Yourself?

I’ve been left alone with myself–like many others–for weeks now and I can’t say that I’ve encountered too many surprises in my moments of introspection. The following is probably too long for you people in a hurry, so the short version is that I’m getting more introverted the longer I stay isolated. Continue reading “Who Do You Become When You’re Left Alone With Yourself?”

The Wearing of Masks

Thanks to some crafty friends, I’m doing my best to stay lighthearted with my health-promoting masks. However, I won’t deny this simple fact: I hate wearing them. And yet, here I am, in the mix with everyone else, doing my very minor part to stop myself from inadvertently sharing anything in my nose or mouth that might get someone else sick (I hasten to add that I have no symptoms, but then like most Americans, I also haven’t been tested). Continue reading “The Wearing of Masks”

Forced in on Myself

I’m not expecting any great “transformation” or personal insights during this period of enforced isolation. They could happen, mind you, but I’m not expecting or forcing any. What follows are my thoughts about the state of my soul before and during this shared crisis called pandemic. Continue reading “Forced in on Myself”

Taking My Bad News Orally

Updated: In error, I posted that the resorts (hotels) would be closing, too. At present (3/13/2020), the resorts remain open. The parks are scheduled to close Monday, 3/16.

It’s been a little tense here in Orlando this week, culminating last night in the announcement that the two biggest employers/money making enterprises in town–Walt Disney World and Universal Studios–will be closing their theme parks effective Sunday night in response to concerns about this virus/pandemic galloping around the planet. I’m not happy, to put it mildly. Listening to or watching the news makes it worse somehow. Continue reading “Taking My Bad News Orally”

Working on My Inside by Working on My Outside

When I get into a funk, which has been the case  off and on lately, I’ll often spend a great deal of time in analysis mode: figuring out what’s going wrong, trying to identify ways to fix it, and setting myself (theoretically) on a path toward healthy thinking. Here’s the thing: despite 30+ years of journaling and time with and without therapists, I’m remarkably bad at fixing myself. However, one thing I am good at doing is setting external goals and then achieving them. This is what I’m preparing to do with my 2020. Continue reading “Working on My Inside by Working on My Outside”

What Are Emotions and What Am I Supposed to Do with Them?

I’ve mentioned a few times before on this blog that I’m a moody person. I’ve not always been thrilled with this trait. Boys/men are taught not to display their emotions (save for a few “acceptable” ones like sternness or anger or mild humor), and I’ve been going against that grain all my life. This morning, in the midst of an early-morning fog, I asked myself a useful question while journal writing: what are emotions? My answer lies below. Continue reading “What Are Emotions and What Am I Supposed to Do with Them?”